The drums are sounding, people cheer in the street, children wave flags. Women are swooning. IU Fencing Practice has started. During our VP’s warmup, an unexpected guest stopped by today. Neo from the Matrix wanted our Sabre coach to teach him how to dodge swords. Apparently bending backwards as the blades swings @ you is not an efficient way to doge a sword. Our Sabre coach tried his best, but Neo kept trying to dodge the blades with back bends. Now he’s stuck that way. He walked out of here bent at the waist in a 90 degree angle. He waved good-bye as he awkwardly left. Don’t worry though. He signed a waiver. The club hopes Neo never has to come in contact with a blade-wielder ever again, but, if he does, we recommend a mask & some retreating.
BY: EMMA RAUSCH